For four days before that, I was at a yoga and meditation retreat.
That's two weeks of pretty solid going within.
I'm exhausted both physically and mentally.
I'm also feeling refreshed and primed.
Today is a resting day. My body says, "take it easy." I'm sitting on my friend's back porch with my feet up, resting my sore hamstring. I didn't pull it, it just is tender. I'm listening. I look at the grass and want to mow it for him, but I know that it can wait another day.
I finished some things that I started in the last few years these past two weeks.
The yoga retreat was the bookend to another retreat that I went to with the same two ladies two summers ago. In the first retreat, I opened up the energy of change, invoking Kali and her destruction of an old life. This one was more like a rebuilding after a rough storm, healing the still wounded areas. It completed that cycle for me. There was a very sweet camaraderie among the ladies and an overall feeling of well-being and healing. It was a very nurturing group.
I went straight from that into the second half of a yoga training I started last summer. I became very aware of how my yoga practice aligns on and off the mat. We spent a lot of time on alignment and being bodily aware. We spent one afternoon looking at the natural alignment of all of our bodies. We found that everyone has imbalances in the body. Which hand you use predominantly, if you compensate for something like a vision impairment, if you overwork one area of the body, you see it show up other places.People's hips and shoulders are not naturally even; we place our weight more strongly on one side than the other. Injuries long past healed may influence our posture today. I have a strong curve in my lower back. I naturally raise my sternum too much. This leaves me open and vulnerable in the core, allowing my power to bleed out from the front and keeping me unaware of my back body. I learned to drop my tail bone down, engage my core and retain my strength and power, instead of it seeping out. I can still open my heart, but I don't have to let go of everything. For me, this is about setting boundaries as well as about finding my own personal strength. How I hold myself and practice on the mat directly influences and is influenced by how I practice my life off the mat.
But today, I rest.
Namaste' ya'll!
